{We are excited to share with you today, a little peek into The Baby Companion book. The following is a excerpt from Chapter 1 in which Dr. Andrea Johnston shares what to expect before you leave the hospital with your brand new bundle of joy. More sneak peeks to come as we look towards the book release on April 1!!}

Before You Leave the Hospital

Before you are released from the hospital, your baby will receive several tests to ensure he is ready to go home. These tests are routine and should have minimal, if any, effect on your baby. If you would like to be present for these screenings, please talk to your doctor or nurse. Every hospital has a different policy on how and when such tests are administered, so make sure you talk it over with them beforehand.

APGAR. The APGAR score (appearance, pulse, grimace, activity, respiration) is used to assess your baby’s condition at one minute and five minutes of age (and sometimes at ten minutes or longer). The score is based on baby’s color, heart rate, muscle tone, reflex response, and breathing. A low score may indicate the need for resuscitation assistance (supplemental oxygen) or chest X-rays. The score is not predictive of how healthy your baby will be as he grows up and does not indicate intelligence or ability in any way.

Newborn screen. The newborn screen is a mandatory state screening for multiple genetic diseases that can be life-threatening. For many of these congenital diseases, treatment can be as simple as a special formula or a special diet when taking solids. A small heel prick will draw a blood sample around twenty-four hours after birth. Results usually come within a week or two. You should alert your baby’s doctor of any genetic diseases that run in your family before this screen is performed.

Bilirubin screen. The bilirubin screen tests for jaundice. For further explanation on this test, review the section on jaundice later in this chapter. This test is done in most hospitals on the day of discharge, or sooner if your baby’s skin appears yellow.

Hearing screen. A hearing screen is performed on all babies prior to discharge from the nursery. The purpose of the screen is to rule out any congenital hearing loss that could be present at birth. Do not be alarmed if your baby does not pass this test in the hospital. Your baby’s nurse may try the test multiple times and still not get a “passing” read. This is usually due to fluid and debris from birth that is still present in the ear canals, blocking the transmission and causing baby to fail the test or “refer.” The doctor or nurse may use this term to let you know your baby did not pass the test. Your baby may also “refer” simply because a newborn’s ear canals are so small that the test does not work properly. If your baby does fail the hearing screen, do not panic. Your doctor or nurse will make an appointment to have the test repeated sometime in the first month after birth. Nearly all babies pass the follow-up test. If your baby still does not pass, he will need to see an audiologist for further evaluation. You should alert your doctor of a family history of deafness.

Circumcision. If you have a son, you will need to decide whether you want him to be circumcised. While there is some evidence that circumcision provides preventative health benefits, these benefits are not substantial enough for the AAP to strongly recommend that newborn males be routinely circumcised. Circumcision is completely a personal choice, often based on tradition in your own family. No matter whether you choose circumcision or not, your child will not be the “only one” in his class either way. 
Circumcision, the removal of the foreskin of the penis, is a surgical procedure usually performed in the hospital in the days following birth. While some parents circumcise their son for cultural and religious reasons, many parents simply do so for personal hygiene, feeling that it is easier to keep a circumcised penis clean.

Other Instructions You Will Receive Before Discharge

Cord care. Believe it or not, there are several viewpoints when it comes to umbilical cord care. Your baby’s pediatrician may recommend that you use rubbing alcohol to clean the cord with diaper changes. She may also recommend that you do nothing. Some research shows that just leaving the cord alone unless it becomes soiled is the best method. Some hospitals may use an antiseptic stain on the cord after birth to prevent infections (often it looks blue or purple). Do not be concerned if you notice the cord area appearing this color. Your nurses and pediatrician will review their recommendations with you and give you instructions accordingly before you are discharged from the hospital.

Circumcision care. Vaseline, Vaseline, Vaseline! There’s no such thing as too much Vaseline when it comes to circumcision care. You will need to keep Vaseline (some doctors recommend using gauze as well) on your baby’s healing skin for ten to fourteen days after the circumcision is performed. Sometimes the head of the penis can get a light yellow “film” of tissue as it is healing. This can easily be mistaken for pus. Although circumcision infections are not common, you should let his pediatrician know if you have any concerns.

Your baby will be seen by a pediatrician every day that he is in the hospital. This doctor may be the pediatrician you’ve chosen or (if your pediatrician does not make rounds in your birthing center) a staff pediatrician. Each day, she will come and examine your baby from head to toe. She will discuss with you any concerns she has and will also be there to answer any questions you might have. Having a new baby is stressful, and you may have a million questions. Don’t hesitate to ask—even if your questions seem minor or silly. Sometimes these seemingly insignificant issues can pile up, leaving you feeling lost and helpless. If you had a typical vaginal delivery, you should be cleared to go home two days after birth. If you had a cesarean section, you will likely need to stay an extra day as your body begins to heal. If your baby requires extra monitoring or is admitted to the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), he may require an extended stay in the hospital. Assuming all is well with you and your baby, you both will be discharged from the hospital two to three days after birth with instructions for follow-up.

Don’t be in a hurry to leave your hospital or birthing center. Many parents cannot wait to get their baby home and settled. This is understandable, but remember—in the hospital, you have the help of a trained medical professional who is there to ensure the complete comfort and safety of you and your baby. Enjoy it while it lasts!

What questions do you have about what to expect before you bring baby home from the hospital?

How It Works

In a normal woman’s menstrual cycle, the complex fluctuations of estrogen and progesterone trigger the brain to cause the ovary to ovulate and spit out an egg. The classic birth control pill combines estrogen and progesterone to keep your female hormones at a steady state, preventing ovulation from occurring.

Much has changed about the pill in the last 50 years: the doses are 10 times lower and the side effects much less. The pill works really well for preventing pregnancy, 97% of the time when you remember to take it. Missing just 2 pills in any given pack can result in ovulation. Today there are phone apps to help you remember if the old fashioned idea of setting your pill pack by your toothbrush doesn’t work.

The Good

The pill has many strong points. The current low dose formulations are well tolerated. Most women will notice a decrease in flow and less cramping with their period. The estrogen in the pill also binds excess testosterone in your system resulting in less acne. Keeping the hormones at a steady state reduces PMS symptoms. The pill gets out of your system very quickly when you quit taking it, so you can conceive soon after stopping the pill, no matter how many years you have been taking it.

The Bad

Estrogen in the birth control pill can reduce milk supply in nursing mothers, therefore it is not the optimal contraceptive choice for new moms.

While the estrogen in the pill binding the excess testosterone in your system is great for your face, it is not good for your sex drive. Some women are more sensitive to the lack of testosterone than others, but many do report a drop in libido when taking the pill.

Other annoying side effects include abnormal bleeding, headaches, nausea and breast tenderness. Most of these side effects will resolve or decrease after 3 months, but in some women they are troublesome enough for them to stop taking the pill.

The Ugly

There are rare but serious side effects to the pill. The risk of DVT (a blood clot in the legs) and stroke are the most serious. The risk of DVT is 7/10,000 per year. As a comparison, the risk of blood clots when not taking the pill is 2/10,000 per year and the risk during pregnancy is 70/10,000 per year. This risk decreases significantly after the first year of pill use. Blood clots are dangerous because they can travel through your blood stream and lodge in your lungs, causing death.

The other serious risk is stroke. The increased risk of stroke is 2/1,000,000 per year. The risk of stroke is associated with women who smoke or who have high blood pressure over the age of 35 while using the pill.  Additionally, migraines with aura (when you see sparkles before the headache starts) can put you at a slight increased risk of stroke.

Is ‘Yaz’ a bad pill?

Yaz and its cousins Yasmin, BeYaz, Safryl and their generics are made with a unique progesterone called ‘drosperinone’. These pills have a slight increase risk of DVT, at 11/10,000.  That’s 4/10,000 more risk than the regular pill. That is not clinically significant for most providers (only lawyers).

What I personally find with Yaz is that its a ‘love it or hate it’ pill. Either people feel great on it, or it makes them feel weird and moody. The risk of DVT is always highest the first year taking the pill, so if you are on Yaz and doing well, then likely you should continue it.  For a better visual you can check out this post, which does an excellent job of explaining the relative risks of DVT and the pill.

Are generic pills OK?

Generic pills work well to prevent pregnancy, but can sometimes lead to more abnormal bleeding than their name brand counterparts. By law generics can vary their hormone content by 20%, which in the low dose pills can amplify side effects. However, with several generic pills on the $8 list at Walmart, it’s hard to beat the price.

What about the patch and ring?

Ortho Evra is a birth control patch that works exactly like the pill, only the hormone is absorbed through your skin. You change the patch weekly. This is a good option for women who have trouble remembering the pill.

Nuvaring also works like the pill, only the hormone is absorbed vaginally. The Nuvaring is a soft plastic ring (think junior high jelly bracelet) that you place vaginally yourself, like a tampon. There is no special way to insert it. Most women do not feel it once it is in place. You leave it in for 3 weeks out of the month, then remove it the week of your period. You can either leave it in or take it out for intercourse.

Both Nuvaring and Ortho Evra have a slight increased risk of blood clots at 9/10,000. Yes, that’s an entire 2/10,000 over the pill.

Is there a pill with lower side effects?

There is a new pill out, called Natazia, with a different estrogen that doesn’t effect sex drive. Can I get a ‘Woot! Woot!’? It also seems to be tolerated by women who haven’t done well on other pills in the past. Of course it’s new, so it doesn’t have a generic.

What about the pills where you only have your period every 3 months? Is that safe?

The ‘period’ that you have on the pill is not a real period. Essentially, there is no medical reason to have a period at all when you’re on the pill. However, regular scheduled bleeding can reduce random break through bleeding. The pills that have fewer periods are safe and are especially beneficial to women with severe menstrual cramps and other menstrual issues. The key with these pills is to realize that you will likely have random bleeding for the first 3-6 months, but if you can be patient, it will eventually become the every third month period as promised.

Have I addressed all of your questions or concerns about the pill?

When we first started this blog, I was overly concerned with people’s perception of it. In an effort to uphold my professional image, I attempted to make all posts palatable to all. I avoided any topic that might be too controversial. In hindsight, that shouldn’t have been that big of an issue because no one who wasn’t related to us was actually reading the blog.  At the beginning of this year, I essentially stopped caring about controversy. I decided that since so few were reading, I may as well write about whatever I wanted.  It started with this post on home birth, a topic that I was passionate about, but had been afraid to tackle. Instead of getting the hate mail I had feared, this topic struck up a respectful, intelligent conversation among our readers. As the year has progressed, we have become more free with our topics, and guess what? People are actually reading it!

This week I am biting the bullet and discussing birth control. Considering that our blog is about pregnancy, perhaps it’s a little odd, but nevertheless contraception has been repeatedly requested as a topic by our readers. This is another controversial area that I have avoided in the past due to fear of backlash, but I think it’s an important one. There is A LOT of misinformation out there concerning contraception, especially from ‘Christian’ organizations.

Over the next week I will present you facts, statistics and my opinion on the various types of contraception. You can then use the information to prayerfully decide your own convictions on this very personal topic.

I will discuss some hot button issues such as whether IUDs cause abortion, whether Yaz really is a ‘bad pill’ and when I believe life begins. You will also learn why Natural Family Planning is my favorite form of birth control.

For those who feel that Christians shouldn’t practice birth control, I fully respect your beliefs and admire your convictions. I hope we can ‘agree to disagree’ and you will join us back on the blog next week when this series is finished. And if you need an OB, check me out, because I love delivering babies and you keep me busy!

As usual, this blog cannot give out individualized medical advice, but if you have a general question about a form of contraception, I would be happy to answer it for you in the comments.

Each day I will post about a specific form of contraception, then at the end of the week I will add all those links back into this post to make them easier to bookmark/Pin.

My sources for this series include several text books and articles. I will do some foot noting, but I am not going to take the time to footnote every reference. If you desire to know where I got a specific bit of information, I am happy to provide that to you.

Who’s ready for some controversy?aception?

TPC Disclaimer: The information in this series in based upon Dr. Rupe’s medical training and additional research into each topic. The posts are meant to be a guide for readers who are considering these forms of contraception. We acknowledge that even amongst a faith-based community there will be readers with differing opinions. We respect the viewpoint of every person in this community. At times Dr. Rupe may share her personal opinion which she formed after much research and prayer on a subject. When delivering a personal opinion, she will note it as such. It is not our intent to influence your beliefs but rather empower you with medical information to help you prayerfully consider your options for birth control.

An OB/GYN’s Guide to Contraception

Part 1: How You Get Pregnant

Part 2: The Pill

Part 3: IUDs

Part 4: Depo Provera

Part 5: Nexplanon

Part 6: The Mini Pill

Part 7: The Morning After Pill

Part 8: Condoms, Diaphragms and Natural Family Planning

Part 9: Tubal, Essure and Vasectomy

I suppose that’s the best word to describe it. Discouragement.

It’s been a crazy busy fall with lots of traveling, sick children and writing. My house hasn’t been cleaned in. . .well, I’d better not say for fear you’ll call the authorities on me. The laundry continues to pile up as does the stuff I keep telling myself I’m going to sort through and get rid of so that we can simplify our lives. I’ve finally started an exercise program that I am keeping to (successfully no less) but something always seems to try to get in the way. This week it’s my health. I feel like I could sleep for days. The vicious cycle just keeps on spinning and I can’t seem to stop it.

This morning I dropped the kids off at mother’s day out. . .a task that always seems not quite worth the effort. But then I come home to the quiet and I realize why I fought with my two children to get dressed, eat their breakfast and brush their teeth. . .so I could have 5 glorious hours to myself. And yes, I could use this time to clean my hasn’t-been-cleaned-in-weeks home. But there is other work to do.

On the way home from the drop off I thought about how far I feel from the Lord, although ironically, He seems so close. It’s been a while since I’ve sat with Him. And I know that’s why everything seems so out of control. I decided to sit with a cup of coffee and read before I attacked anything else on my to-do list – something I used to do so well but has fallen by the wayside in this stormy season. I pick up Jesus Calling {you all know it’s my favorite devo} and I read:

“Do not be discouraged by the difficulty of keeping your focus on me. I know that your heart’s desire is to be aware of my presence continually.” {Yes!} “You live in a world that is rigged to distract you. Each time you plow your way through the massive distractions to communicate with me, you achieve a victory. Rejoice in these tiny triumphs and they will increasingly light up your days.” {So encouraging!}

If you are a mom to little ones, you probably already understand this truth. If you are a mom-t0-be, you will understand it soon enough. There will always be more than we can handle. There will always be things getting in the way of what we “should” do or “could” do. But today, just as I celebrated the fact that I finally ran 5 minutes straight the other day {yes, it’s a HUGE accomplishment for me} I am choosing to celebrate the fact that I chose Him first this morning. It doesn’t always happen, I admit it. But when it does, my days are lighter {full of more light and less weight}.

Don’t be discouraged mama. Even if you didn’t choose Him first today, you can try again tomorrow and rejoice when you do. Celebrate each small accomplishment you make in your daily walk, both spiritual and practical. Be kind to yourself and extend grace for the areas in which you struggle to get ahead.

And may we get a little closer to stopping the fast-spinning cycle of life each day we choose His presence over chaos.

What can you do today to choose Him first?

I’ve been reading through The Baby Companion manuscript lately as we begin the editing process. As I read, I am prayerful that the words on each page would contain a message of peace and joy for mamas walking through baby’s first year. When I consider the feelings we want this book to invoke, I think about three secrets that I hope run through it’s pages. I call them “secrets” because not many books and websites talk about them. Because they are not black and white. These “secrets” will not reveal to you exactly how it should be done. They will not fix your problems (directly) but I believe they will allow you to thrive during the first year of your baby’s life. Our prayer is that this message will be found within The Baby Companion book so that moms can enjoy every single day of their baby’s first 12 months.

3 Secrets to Thriving Through Baby’s First Year

1. Seek wisdom, not an answer.

Wisdom will look differently for each one of us. When we seek a sure answer to our dilemma as moms, we often miss out on what wisdom would say for our baby. It’s ok to seek advice and tips from other moms, books or on the internet. Just make sure you look for wisdom that is unique to your situation rather than the be all, end all answer that promises to fix your problem. Don’t be afraid to take some principles of one method and combine them with a principle of another. Find what works for you. Most of all, ask God to lead you every step of the way.

2. Be consistent, but remain flexible.

One of the most important pieces of advice you will hear is to remain consistent as you guide your baby through the first year. With eating, sleeping and developmental practices, it is very important to be consistent. What many people do not tell you is that you also must remain flexible. I realize this sounds like a dichotomy of advice. The truth is, motherhood requires more finesse and nuance than perhaps anything you’ve ever done in your life. As you seek consistency in your days but remain open to adjusting based on babies immediate needs, you will find a groove. Just remember that groove may look different from one day to the next making motherhood quite a dance.

3. Allow your confidence to come from God alone.

Not from your girlfriends, someone’s blog post or your mother in law. Motherhood is a show for an audience of ONE. Seek God’s approval and guidance and let your daily, in the trenches confidence come from him alone. Your friends or the author of that book you just read does not understand the ins and outs of your daily life with baby. Therefore, they could never fully validate you. Be confident that God will lead you and give you the wisdom and strength to thrive as a mom.

What secrets have you found helped you walk through baby’s first year?

A while back I did a post on my life with PCOS. I was in the middle of trying to conceive our second child and we’d had several set backs. That post was honest and a bit sad but hopeful. A few months later I conceived miraculously and that sweet boy is now 15 months old.

I have my babies but I still have PCOS. And although I’m not facing the challenge of fertility any longer, I daily face the challenges of living with this condition. I shared in that post that I felt like my body was broken – that it didn’t do what it was supposed to do (easily produce babies). We got it to do that but there are so many other things it’s not doing well. And I’m left with the choice to live with a broken body or to fight for wholeness, even if it might take a bit more work than I’d like.

Dr. Rupe has shared some amazing information and tips for those of us living with PCOS in her series this month. As my contribution in honor of PCOS Awareness Month, I wanted to share my point of view as a patient along with some encouragement for how we can get our bodies on track.

Like me, you may feel like you are broken because your body isn’t working properly. Much like those that live with diseases or disabilities, it can be discouraging and frustrating to feel less than whole. But I believe that He works all things together for our good (Romans 8:28) and therefore good can come out of a place of lack. I’ve spent the past year since my second (and last) child was born in denial about what it’s going to take to get my body to a good place. Worn out from life with a baby (and a preschooler), I didn’t want to face it. But the time has come and Dr. Rupe’s posts have been a great encouragement for me to get off my butt and fight for my health. In this post she said, “The metabolism of  PCOS is really just not fair. Your girlfriends can pig out on pizza on the weekend and still fit in their skinny jeans, meanwhile, you walk past a bag of Oreos and gain 5 pounds. Acceptance that this is how your metabolism works is a key first step. You must learn to treat yourself like a diabetic. A higher protein, lower carb diet is going to be your best bet.“

She’s right. It isn’t fair. I hate that I have to deal with this but sometimes life isn’t fair. I can think of a million worse, unfair things that people have to deal with. “Injustice” (that seems dramatic but stay with me here) should lead us to fight not cower in defeat. So friends, it’s time. It’s time to redirect all of my fighting energy that I once put into conceiving my children to taking care of myself and beating this thing called PCOS. I hope those of you that struggle with it will join me. If we have enough girls in our community, perhaps we can form an accountability group. I’ll admit, I’m scared to death to put this out there. I’m not the most disciplined person in the world and I often give up before I overcome. But I cannot look only to myself for strength to do this. I am trusting the Lord to provide everything I need because He desires that we are healthy and whole beings, at our best to do what He’s called us to do.

5 Ways to Beat PCOS (or any weight issue)

1. Find Your Motivation – For me, my motivation was once the desire to conceive. Now, it’s the desire to be healthy so I can keep up with my kids and be a good example for them. While I was pregnant with my 1st, I had gestational diabetes. I was put on a strict diet and ended up losing 20 lbs while pregnant. I’d never lost 20 lbs in my life. I was motivated by the desire to keep my baby safe and have a healthy delivery. But once I delivered, my motivation was no longer there and I blew it. Gained it all back. I failed to find the motivation to keep it off. Let’s find our motivation and keep it at the forefront of our life.

2. Find Your Support System - Whether it’s your husband, girlfriends, mom or a personal trainer – find someone (or a few people) to keep you accountable. Don’t neglect to vocalize your goals because you are afraid you might fail. Put it out there. No one is going to fault you for falling short. The important thing is that you try and work hard to meet your goals. Let’s put together a support system of people we trust that will cheer us along the way.

3. Find Your Strategy for Exercise – This week I started the couch to 5K program. I’ve been wanting to do this for a while. Now that I have both kids in mother’s day out, I have the time to spend on “training.” I chose this plan because it is simple, goal oriented and attainable. Perhaps you don’t have time without your child(ren) at all. Talk with your spouse or family members and find a way to fit in some workout time. Dr. Rupe said working out is not an option, it’s a command. We have to do it. I don’t enjoy working out which is why I never worked hard to find a strategy for doing so. But we have to get moving. Even if you just put on some music and dance around with your kids, you are doing more than you were before. Put on a workout DVD and let them play around you while you exercise. It may not be the ideal situation but at least you are starting somewhere. Let’s find a strategy for exercising regularly that is simple and attainable.

4. Find Your Plan for Healthy Eating – Dr. Rupe gave us some good tips in her post last week for eating with PCOS. I am determined to get back to the plan that I followed when I had gestational diabetes because it worked for me. Low and controlled carb intake is key for women with PCOS. Talk with your doctor or a local nutritionist about what plan would be best for you. But don’t over think it. Making small changes can also do a lot for your body. In addition to the low carb plan, some of the small changes I will be making are:

- Drinking more water (I’ve gotten in a bad habit of drinking more coffee than water)

- Eating a more well-rounded breakfast to start my day

- Eating out less (also a bad habit we’ve gotten into with busyness)

- Allowing myself small treats instead of the full size daily ones I have been eating (I adore chocolate)

I will be posting this list on my fridge as a reminder to myself that I must follow these guidelines. As I said in The Pregnancy Companion book, making healthy choices happens one choice at a time. Don’t think about the life change that has to happen overall at first. Let’s try to make the best choice, one choice at a time.

5. Find Ways to Reward Yourself – I have a picture on my fridge of a shirt from my favorite store that I am going to buy myself when I lose 10 lbs. Not only will losing 10 lbs give me the reward of buying a cute shirt, I will look much better in said shirt after I’ve lost 10 lbs. So it’s a win, win! Find small ways to reward your progress. Give yourself something to look forward to for working hard and reaching your goals. Let’s find ways to tell ourselves “you deserve {insert awesome and motivating reward here} because you overcame the obstacle of PCOS!”

Friends, I am excited about this new season. I am fueled with a passion to beat this annoying, challenging and unfair condition. I want to thrive in my life as a woman, a wife, a mom. . .I don’t want to be bogged down by the unhealthy effects of PCOS.

Will you join with me?

{Photo used courtesy of Creative Commons}

I am absolutely exhausted.

Every night after I put the kids in bed I release a great, big sigh of relief as I look forward to a few hours to myself. Perhaps this is why I stay up way too late and start my days even more tired than I need to be. But I digress. . .

Where was I? Oh right. Tired.

I know you understand. Most days we don’t ever sit down. Ever. Pacing back and forth between the kitchen and living room where we cook meals, clean up, change diapers and TV channels (yeah, I’m not proud but I do a lot of that these days). We kiss boo boos and wipe snotty noses and if you are in the toddler stage like me, we pull our climbing monkey off of something every other minute.

Tired.

I wanted to attack this week head on. I truly carried a deep desire within myself to give this Monday a good butt-kicking. But Monday kicked my butt before I even got out of bed (I blame The Hunger Games trilogy. Can.not.put.it.down. Almost done though). You can always tell a day is going to be rough by how your kids greet you in the morning.

“Mommy! It’s morning!” means it just might be a good day.

“Mooommmy!!!!! What are we going to do today?” means someone might be a tad difficult to deal with.

“I don’t want that for breakfast. Why can’t I have ice cream?!” means you should probably just go back to bed.

With my toddler (almost 13 months), it’s not as obvious since he’s not yet able to talk. But being the clingy little dude that he is, I can pretty much tell immediately what kind of day we are going to have. Lately, most mornings are met with whines and a little foot stomping dance that would be cute if it didn’t mean he wanted to be picked up, right now! and never put down.

So despite the fact that I woke up ready to kick some Monday tail, I was very quickly deflated. I knew it was going to be a tough day and my mood was proof. I try to read the Bible or a devotional every day at breakfast. This morning I was led to a verse in Psalm that I love. It was such a good reminder for me today.

“My flesh and my heart may fail but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” Psalm 73:26

I carried this word with me today and although I didn’t defeat the day, I was driven to ask God what he would say to me and to you about how to thrive during this tough season. I’d forgotten how hard the toddler stage is. Between 12-24 months, little ones need constant attention and guidance. I believe he spoke to me – giving me three keys to walking through this time with grace and joy. Although I accepted these instructions as a guide for the exhausting, not-a-moment-to-sit-down toddler season, I know this truth will speak to all moms and caregivers.

3 Keys to Thriving the Toddler Stage

1. Practice Patience. The key word here being ‘practice.’ Patience is a fruit of the spirit in our lives but it must be learned and rehearsed. I’m a huge believer in the idea of mind over matter. If I could just get it in my mind to react with patience and grace, we would all be better for it (that is, my kids and I). Chasing a toddler requires much focus and patience. I suppose this season of motherhood is God’s way of giving us ‘practice.’

2. Lavish Love. I find with both my toddler and my 4 year old, the more I lavish love, the less they fuss. It’s that simple. Emotional deposits into their account mean less withdrawals from mine. Sometimes (I hate to admit) I’m so busy or tired or distracted I fail to do this, but I am learning to stop and randomly kiss my sweet girl or grab my little boy and swing him around. . .all.day.long. A little goes a long way when it comes to lavish love.

3. Pursue Peace. Go after it. That’s right. Hunt it down and capture it for your home. For me, this means turning everything off for a while and just sitting in quiet, reading books. It also means that as soon as I hit publish on this post I am going to attack the toy bins in my living room. My kids don’t play with half the stuff in there. Why is it taking over my space? Peace isn’t only about one or two senses. All of our senses contribute to (or prevent) the peace in our life. What do we hear, see, smell, taste and touch that could be simplified in our life? Where is there excess that we can remove for ourselves and our children? Pursue peace.

These keys are a goal. An attainable goal. But when our flesh and our heart fail, he is our strength and our portion forever. . .ready with everything we need to get up and start all over tomorrow.

What about you moms? How have you learned to handle tough toddler days?

{Photo used via Creative Commons}

The general public and particularly pregnant women are now more knowledgeable than ever before on the subject of cord blood banking and its potential benefits. As a result the number of donations is growing as the importance of stem cell research and its therapeutic applications become more widely known.  The blood harvested from the umbilical cord is rich in “stem cells,” or immature blood cells that, with the help of some very clever laboratory techniques, are able to mature and transform into other types of cell. They are also extremely useful in their own right when used in direct treatment for certain conditions.   

What is cord blood?

Cord blood is the blood remaining in the umbilical cord and placenta after the baby has been delivered. Usually, this blood and tissue is discarded, but breakthroughs in the understanding of stem cells and their incredible potential for therapeutic use has led to the practice of collecting and storing the blood.  Typically, 3-5 ounces (88-145 ml) of the baby’s blood is collected from the fetal end of the umbilical cord after separation, so the infant is not affected in any way.  The minimum viable amount for a donation is 75ml.  Once tested for viral infections, including HIV and hepatitis, it is tissue-typed to determine HLA (a determination of compatibility with other people), blood group and cell count. The details are entered in the Cord Blood Registry and the donation is cryogenically stored until it is needed.

What illnesses can be treated?

At the present time a number of health issues can be treated using cord blood stem cells, including leukemia and lymphoma, bone marrow failure, blood disorders like sickle cell anemia, immuno-deficiency and metabolic disorders. Approximately 70 diseases have been successfully treated using cord blood cells and stem cell transplants are now being linked to possible therapies for cerebral palsy and type 1 diabetes.

Who can benefit?

The principle beneficiaries of cord blood cell transplants are infants and children, and it is tempting to think that the donor child is the ideal recipient because the problems of cell rejection experienced in most transplants do not apply.  Similarly, siblings have a higher chance of matching.  But overall, unless there are very special circumstances, the chance a child may only need a cell transplant of any kind is not higher than 1:1000, but ranges up to 1:200,000.  In the case of diseases like leukemia in the child however, the cord cells may already be compromised and so have no therapeutic use.

Medical bodies are agreed that cord cell donation and storage has enormous benefit for the general population, providing a source of tremendously useful material, and they support public banks and a cord blood registry to make the bank efficient.  The link with the donor is broken as soon as the batch is typed and tested and then can be used to treat the widest number of patients. Funding restrictions mean that only a few hospitals can collect cord cell samples in the USA.

On the other hand, prospective parents are offered the opportunity to have their baby’s cord cells collected and stored for their infant’s and family’s use if ever required.  The service costs around $600 to $2000 plus around $100 storage charge per year.  This is, in the USA, the most likely route to cord blood storage for those with the means to pay.

Have you considered cord blood storage for your child? Why or why not?

I’m over my head in research on making your own baby food this month. Although I made my own for a while with my son, I am digging in deeper before sharing my “expertise” with others in a book. There are many resources out there devoted to the subject and we’ll definitely point you to them in the book. I’m pretty sure it’s quite simple though. One of those things we tend to over think as moms but would be better served simply using common sense.

There are several reasons to make your own baby food.

1. It’s economical (when you plan).

2. You know exactly what’s in baby’s food.

3. You can get your baby used to eating what you eat.

4. You can create the texture you feel your baby is ready for.

All those reasons aside, there is nothing wrong with feeding your baby food from a jar (or a pouch these days). There are many options available on the market that are perfectly healthy for baby, including many organic options. But if you are interested in trying your hand at making baby food, here are a few tips to get you started.

Shopping

Buy the freshest produce possible and use items within a day or two after purchase. Choose vegetables that are not high in nitrates which can be harmful to baby. Those known to have high nitrate levels are: green beans, carrots, spinach, squash and beets. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics website, commercially prepared vegetables (frozen/jar food) are safer to use as manufacturers test for nitrates. It is not a bad idea to use frozen vegetables to prepare baby food, especially if you want to try the items listed above. The AAP recommends peas, corn and sweet potatoes as good first foods for babies.

Prepping

You will need to have a good system of food preparation if you want to be in this for the long haul. Choose a day of the week where you can set aside an hour or two for baby food prep. Sunday afternoons are a great time for this. Thoroughly wash your fruits and vegetables using a brush. There are many ways to prepare each food but generally you will need to cut/peel your fruits and vegetables to start. Specifically for a younger baby, be careful of leaving too much skin on. Although there is lots of nutrition in the skin, it will add to the bulk and texture of prepared foods and can be harmful to baby. Next you’ll steam or boil the food to get it nice and soft. Make sure it is cooked through enough to be pureed to your baby’s likeness. Lastly, you’ll run your cooked fruits/veggies through a food processor. There are several baby food making systems on the market today that do this quite easily. But a good ole kitchen food processor works just fine as well. Once again, be sure that the food is pureed enough and is the texture you are comfortable with for your baby’s stage.

Storage

Several of the baby food making systems today come with convenient storage tools. An old fashioned ice cube tray (remember those?) works fine as well. Divide your pureed food into equal parts (an ice cube is the perfect serving size), cover well to avoid freezer burn and label with food name and date (some items will alter in color after freezing so it will help to have them labeled).

Serving

Remove the portion of baby food you want to use prior to serving. It is sometimes helpful to take out a days worth of servings and keep them in the fridge. If you heat the food in the microwave be sure to check thoroughly for hot pockets to avoid burning baby’s mouth. Consider sectioning out even one serving into two in case your baby does not want an entire ice cube sized portion. You should dispose of any unused food that baby’s spoon has touched so in order to avoid waste, use a separate bowl or dish to feed baby from.

Simple, right? Much of these tips are common sense. We’ll cover the subject in more depth in The Baby Companion book but for those mamas heading towards this stage, we hope you find these hints helpful.

What are some of YOUR secrets to making your own baby food? What are some of your favorite books and resources? We’d love to hear your tips!

{Photo used via Creative Commons}

Today I am excited to share with you a book that I completely believe in. I had the privilege of meeting these lovely ladies briefly at the Blissdom conference in February but have continued to keep in touch with them online as they’ve launched the book that has been their hearts’ passion for a long time. Megan Tietz and Laura Oyer {you may recognize her name from graceformoms.com where she writes with us} are co-authors of the book, Spirit Led Parenting: From Fear to Freedom in Baby’s First Year. When I first heard the title of the book, my heart skipped a beat because it alone expressed my heart (and I know Dr. Rupe’s heart) for this community of moms-to-be and new moms.

You can read more about the book on the {in}courage blog this week as they are a part of the Bloom Summer Book Club. Check it out to read more from both Megan and Laura as they share their heart behind this powerful book.

As we continue to write the manuscript for The Baby Companion: A Faith-Filled Guide Through the First Year, I love that God is connecting us with like-minded moms who desire to share a message of freedom with new moms. I felt led to write The Pregnancy Companion book because there was not a pregnancy resource out there that brought medicine and faith together. Likewise, I am passionate about The Baby Companion (and my friends’ book, Spirit Led Parenting) because I experienced a ton of fear in my baby’s first year. Every book I turned to promised a solution yet every time it fell short. I was sure the problem was me. But I learned the only problem I had was not listening to the Holy Spirit’s leading (at first). Once I began to let him lead me, I experienced so much peace and actually began to enjoy my days with my little one.

I shared a little sneak peek of The Baby Companion over at Grace for Moms last week. I thought it fitting as I pointed you to {in}courage this week to share a bit of our introduction (albeit a work in progress at this point) so you can understand our heart behind this coming resource. Those of you pregnant right now or walking through baby’s first year will not benefit from this book (for this child) but we hope it will be one that you will recommend to your friends and use yourself with future babies. In the meantime, you absolutely need to grab a copy of Spirit Led Parenting. I know these two books will compliment one another well.

Don’t forget, we are still looking for stories to share in the book. If you had (or are having) a unique experience through baby’s first year, please let us know through a comment or by emailing jesswolstenholm{@}gmail{dot}com. We will be sharing Real Life Stories in each chapter of the book so that moms know they are not alone in their challenges. Difficulty with breastfeeding. . .twins, triplets. . .preemies. . .digestion issues. . .severe sleep issues. . .we want to hear about it. This book is not about two doctors and me telling you what to do. It’s about them sharing their medical expertise and me sharing encouragement for moms to seek the Lord first and foremost and lean into each other to navigate their days. It’s about connection to the Holy Spirit and a community of faith.

{The Baby Companion Sneak Peek}

Introduction {rough draft}

When I had my first baby, I had grandiose ideas of what the first months of motherhood would be like. Don’t get me wrong, I knew there would be sleepless nights and dirty diapers but I thought, like many other things in my life, with enough hard work and diligence I would have reasonable control of the little person that just joined my life. When that was not the case, I felt like a mothering failure. I spent so much of my time and energy trying to figure out what I was doing wrong and worse, asking God what was wrong with my baby and why he wouldn’t give me a break and make her cooperate. Blinded by a culture that has a quick fix answer to every problem (especially in parenting) I knew the root issue was obvious – I was a horrible mother.

One day when my daughter was a few months old, I decided it was time to “sleep train” her (quotes used to emphasize the fact that I didn’t know what I was doing). I used a very popular book on sleep training and scheduling as a guide and I was determined to make it work quickly – just like the book promised. Otherwise it would be a testament to my inability to mother my baby. I put her down for a midday nap and left her room despite the fact that she started crying. I let her cry for a few minutes and then went in to reassure her. She kept crying. Enter baby’s room, reassure with a gentle voice “you’re ok, it’s time to sleep,” exit room, and repeat. This went on for about 30 minutes at which time she began to scream so I sat down on the stairs with my “baby bible” and began to cry myself.

Lord, what am I doing wrong? Please make her go to sleep. If she doesn’t sleep at regularly scheduled intervals then I must be unfit to be her mother. Why would you allow me to be a mother if I can’t even get my child to go to sleep? Maybe this was a bad idea.

And then I clearly heard him say, “Put the book away.”

So I did. And there was silence. Not another sound from her room. She was peacefully sleeping.

“I have given you everything you need to mother this child who is uniquely created to bless your life,” he gently whispered to my tired and doubting heart. “My Holy Spirit is the perfect guide to understand what I am calling you to do as her mother.”

Although I continued to follow some of it’s principles, I didn’t refer to that book (or any method book for that matter) throughout the first year of my daughter’s life. In fact, I haven’t even cracked open that book since my son was born a few months ago. With the Lord’s help, I have been able to let go of the hope of perfection and the idea that there is only one way to do anything in mothering.

So why on earth would I have the gumption to co-write a book about baby’s first year after admitting my slight aversion to baby books? It is our hope that this book would transcend the role of other baby books for you. Think of it as the un-book of baby books. There are many great books on the market that focus on the medical truths that will guide you through baby’s first year. Those books are wonderful tools that offer helpful information as you travel the uncharted waters of motherhood. And there are many other books that promise to offer you a be all, end all solution to every baby issue from sleeping to eating to immunizations. Those books may work wonders for some but they are the ones that got my amateur mother heart into trouble. Those books put in me a deep desire to write this one. This is not a how to book. I learned early on that while the advice and ideas given by others is valuable, every baby and every family is different so what works for one may not be what’s best for some. That is why, in this book, you will find the important medical information needed to guide you through baby’s first year and answer the questions you will encounter along the way gently wrapped in reminders to ultimately let God lead your journey. He has every answer to your silliest and most serious questions. But his answers may be different for you than they were for your girlfriend because after all, every mommy and every baby is different. As I said in The Pregnancy Companion, there are only a few non-negotiables when it comes to parenting. Most issues are about personal preferences and your unique circumstances. That is why God wants you to let his spirit be your baby Companion.

For this book, I have the privilege of partnering with an amazing woman I have known since college. Dr. Andrea Johnston is a great physician, an intelligent woman and a fairly new mother herself. You will be in very good hands, gaining insight and information from this pediatrician mom. You can trust that the sound medical information in this guide is coming straight from the doc. Any spiritual, devotional or practical material will be coming through me {Jessica} after lots of prayer and seeking God for exactly what he wants to say to encourage you.

What You Will Find In This Book

More than anything we pray that you will find grace within these pages. Our desire is to provide you with all of the important medical information you need to empower you to make the best decisions for your baby. At times we will share our own personal stories and points of view. These are not meant to tell you how to do something. They are meant to give you real-life examples. We trust that as you walk with the Lord, he will guide you in exactly what to do in each and every situation for your baby – and you should trust that too!

The book will be broken down into the following sections to guide you along each month of baby’s first year.

Baby Stats – Since babies vary greatly in height and weight, these stats will be averages that will tell you what to expect. Don’t be worried if your baby is bigger or smaller than these guidelines. Discuss any concerns with baby’s doctor.

Development Checker – Once again, we will use guidelines to help you understand the new and exciting things baby may be doing each month. If you are concerned that your baby is not on track with what you read, discuss your concerns with you pediatrician but remember, every baby is different.

Baby Care – We will discuss everything from feeding to diapering to bathing, keeping in mind that many of these topics are about preference rather than what’s right or wrong. Dr. Johnston will give her recommendations based on medical truth and experience but we’ll leave room for you to determine what is best for your baby.

Expectations For Your Doctor Visits – In each chapter we will discuss what you can expect at your next doctor’s visit. Some months you will not visit the pediatrician (unless baby is sick) so we’ll include other helpful information such as tips for communicating with your doctor and how to keep track of baby’s immunizations, etc.

Common Questions You May Have This Month – Each month we’ll address common questions that may be on the forefront of your mind.

Mommy Care – One of the most important factors in enjoying baby’s first year is making sure you take care of yourself along the way. Dr. Heather Rupe (OB/GYN and co-author of The Pregnancy Companion) will be joining us to offer helpful information and advice for taking care of mommy throughout baby’s early days (and beyond).

Truth For The Journey – Just as we did in The Pregnancy Companion, we will include encouraging scriptures and devotional thoughts to accompany you through the very exciting yet exhausting days of motherhood. We’ll also include practical tips and ideas for planning, organizing and even shopping for baby.

Real Life Stories – Because every mother wants to know she’s “not the only one…” we will share stories and experiences from other moms who have dealt with different issues throughout baby’s first year. Hearing how these women walked through difficult times and overcame obstacles will inspire your heart.

Before we get started I want to take a moment to pray this prayer over you, my mothering friend. May these words bring you peace and Godly confidence as you embark on this journey. Remember, you are not alone. Our faithful and gracious God is your baby Companion.

Dear Lord,

Thank you for the precious gift of life that you’ve given my friend. I ask you now to infuse her heart with your righteous confidence, the kind that only comes from walking closely with you. May she know you are near because she daily draws herself to you. Give her wisdom in every moment as she loves and cares for her little one. Lead her through every decision she encounters for her family. Cover each day with your grace so that she can more than merely survive it. Most of all, I pray she would be able to cherish each day of her baby’s first year for they will pass too quickly. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Grace and peace to you as you embark on this exciting journey,

Jessica

Friends, we cannot wait to finish this book so that moms can have a resource that brings medicine and faith together for baby’s first year. Please pray for wisdom as we continue to write.

And please stop by {in}courage this week to check out Spirit Led Parenting. I know you are going to be blessed by this book and these amazing moms.

What would you all like to see discussed in a baby’s first year book? There’s still time to give your input as we put together this resource. We’d love to hear from you!