In the 11 years I’ve been birthin’ babies, I’ve heard some crazy things in the delivery room. While most dads try their best to be supportive during labor, lets face it, this is an entirely new adventure for them. Here are some of the common gaffs that I hear dads make.

1. “That looks easy!”

This is a common faux pas that comes out surprisingly often in the delivery room. I will usually attempt to help save their marriage by suggesting that what he meant to say was “Honey you did so awesome, that you made it look easy.”

Most often, it is an honest mistake on the part of the dad.  In the excitement of the moment, he’s not sure what to say. Trust me dads, no delivery is ever ‘easy.’

2. “My back hurts.”

I recently had a dad request my stool, as I went to deliver his wife’s baby. “Sorry sir, I need the stool to help bring your child into this world,” I said. “But my back really hurts” he replied, as his wife was pushing…without an epidural.

Really, dude? No, you cannot have my stool. You can stand there and be supportive of your beautiful wife as she experiences the worst pain of her life. Plus, I went to school a long time for the privilege of sitting on this stool. Are you going to ask to wear my white coat next, because you are chilly?

While your wife is in labor, you are not allowed to complain. I don’t care if you have a herniated disc and you have been asked to sleep on the floor.

On a related note, it is also bad form to sleep while your wife is pushing.

3. “No, honey you can’t have an epidural, because WE have decided to have natural childbirth.”

Beforehand, women often tell their husbands to not let them get an epidural, no matter what they say. But sometimes…they really mean it.

This is a sticky situation for the dad,  similar to the questions, “Does this outfit make me look fat?” or “Do you think my friend is cute?”  He doesn’t always know the right answer.

He wants to stick to the ‘birth plan’ but he also doesn’t want his wife to suffer. I feel for you dad, but no matter how involved you are in coaching the labor, referring to the experiences of birth in the first person is never a good idea.

In all seriousness, it is a good idea to have a secret code word that your wife can tell you when she really means business about the epidural.

4. “This Chick-fil-A is so awesome!”

Most hospitals do not allow the laboring mom to eat, so don’t devour a Chick-fil-A sandwich in front of your hungry wife. Even if she is not hungry, the smell of food can make her nauseated.

As an aside, do not ever bring a tuna fish sandwich into the room. It stinks…in a bad way.

5. “Just one second, let me finish this Tweet.”

Recently I had to utter a phrase in the delivery room that I thought I would never have to say:

“Dad put down your iPhone, come over here and cut the cord.”  I swear I did.

Technology is awesome. As soon as the baby is born, you want to get the news out ASAP. But take a few minutes and enjoy the birth of your child before you start Facebooking it.

Also, don’t randomly start uploading delivery room pictures, until you look at them very closely. Another technology mistake is the accidental crotch shot upload.

The majority of dads, even the ones who make these mistakes, are overall very supportive. Most dads do rise to the occasion, as I’m sure your hubby will. Just to be safe though, you may want to ‘accidentally’ leave this post up on his laptop tonight.

Did your husband say something he shouldn’t have while you were in labor? If you haven’t experienced birth yet, what do you hope he doesn’t say?

As I looked at my screen to check which patient was next, seeing her name made me smile.

The patient was a delight. I had delivered her first baby two years ago, an adorable baby girl with curly blond hair and rolls on her thighs. The patient pushed like a champ, but despite her efforts, her 10 pound bundle of joy entered this world through a low transverse abdominal incision.

She was newly pregnant with baby number #2.

A perfect flutter of a heart beat was seen on the ultrasound, and all was good.

“Doc, do you think I should try for a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section) or have a planned c-section this time?” she inquired, as we finished up with the usual questions.

I carefully reviewed the risks and benefits of each, encouraging her to weigh which option would be best for her.

As I finished, I noticed she was pursing her lips in anticipation of a question that she could barely contain.

“But Doc,” she asked smugly, like a jeopardy contestant who knew they had the right answer, “What would you do if it were YOU?”

The favorite question. I smiled and leaned back on my rolly stool.

“Nope.” I said as I shook my head back and forth with a smile, “I don’t answer that one.”

Somewhere there has to be a Readers Digest Article, ‘Top Ten Questions to Ask Your Doctor’ and this is probably #1, based on the number of times that I have heard it.

Initially, when I started practicing and my newly board certified brain was bursting with memorized textbook knowledge and randomized controlled trials, I would fall for this trick. I would rattle off my personal opinion on such matters. Because obviously, I knew best.

It didn’t take me long in practice to realize that every women is unique. I was biasing these women with my personal opinion on issues that really, I had no business discussing.

I am not saying I don’t give advice. Of course I do, I am a doctor. I give my best medical recommendation in all situations.  However, I do not give patients my honest, personal opinion of what I would do in their specific situation, because I am not them.  And I am not in their situation.

In obstetrics there are multiple situations when women really need to decide for themselves:

VBAC vs. C-section

Natural vs. epidural

Circumcision vs. no circumcision

These are just a few of the very personal decisions that women need to make for themselves. Options that should NOT be decided by their moms, NOT by their friends and definitely NOT by me.

How do you feel the ‘suggestions’ of others effected your pregnancy decisions?

This weekend Jessica and I had the privilege of attending the Blissdom conference.  We got to hear amazing speakers and meet some awesome bloggers.  The best workshop was given by Jeff Goins.  He was challenging and inspirational. However, his final challenge left me with a cotton mouth:  write what you are most afraid to write about….. and then publish it. Gulp. Here goes, Jeff. 

The first time I was ever involved in a home birth gone bad was two weeks into my OB/GYN rotation as a medical student.

A screaming woman came in by ambulance. Her stretcher sheet appeared to be painted brown from her waist down. The trail of red behind the front tire and the salty smell of fresh blood revealed the source of the sheet stain. The team frantically evaluated the patient and attempted to stabilize her. She had been laboring at home for 3 days and had begun to hemorrhage. An emergency cesarean section was ordered.

The women began to cry.

”I don’t want a c-section,” she was in hysterics between the pain and blood.

The jaded resident just glared at her and responded rather harshly, “Shut up, I’m trying to save your life.”

A scurry of activity ensued. Minutes later the baby was born. As a newbie med student, I was stunned as I watched the chaos of the delivery suite.

The baby did not come out screaming and pink, like all the others I had seen. The nurses used two fingers to rhythmically push down on the limp infant’s chest in an attempt to circulate its blood. After several tense minutes, a heart beat was detected. We had hope. The mom received several units of blood and spent a week in the ICU. Sadly, the baby passed away a few days later.

My young mind could not comprehend the tragedy.

That experience has left me biased.

When I became a OB/GYN resident myself, I treated high risk obstetrical patients. Everyday I saw how quickly a normal labor could develop into a life threatening emergency.

Over the years of training, I saw many other home birth hospital transfers. Luckily, none with such a severe outcome – but with each encounter I had to fight my emotions. I always remained professional toward the patient, but internally my anger and frustration were often not proportional to the situation.

Why did these women value the birth experience itself over the health of the baby? I would often think.

Why did their choice make me so angry? Was it the memory of tragedy? Was it resentment for having to help someone who had initially ignored medical advice? Was it the fact that their decision also affected the life of their child?

The longer I was in private practice, the more I began to understand the home birth proponents’ point of view. In the real world, emergencies are rare and most deliveries are uncomplicated. Our national cesarean delivery rate is soaring to unacceptable levels. I read reports of doctors doing unnecessary CDs, not caring that by scaring a woman’s uterus, they are at that moment limiting the number of children she can bare.

I’m saddened by my fellow doctors who make decisions out of fear of lawsuits, rather than choosing what is in the best interest of their patients.

The longer I practice the more I have become an advocate for those women who desire natural childbirth and VBAC. I try to avoid interventions and work with women to reduce their risk of cesarean section.

Why does home birth still bother me? After much soul searching, I believe it’s because I take it too personally.

I sacrificed years of my life in training to be a doctor. The sleepless nights, 100 hour work weeks and hours of study. I saw horrific tragedies that my heart could barely process.

I missed kissing my own kids goodnight too many times.

I did not do it for money.

My passion is for helping women have the healthiest most peaceful pregnancy they can. I want to lay vigorous pink babies on their mom’s chest and watch beautiful tears of joy roll down the fathers face. I want to save lives. I don’t want another mother to ever have to bury her baby on my watch.

I feel like an engineer who worked for years to build a state of the art bridge across a river, only to discover that people were crossing the river on a rope swing because they don’t trust the engineers. Most of them make it across just fine, but every once in while someone will needlessly slip into the water.

I’ve read the studies. I know statistically that the risks of home birth are low. But they are still there. I understand the reasons that women feel that home birth is the best option for them. But the idea still makes me cringe.

When thinking about pregnancy and childbirth, what words or ideas make you cringe? C-section? Epidural? Pitocin? Vagina?

When I’m on call, I frequently get phone calls from patients concerning whether or not they are in labor. The two most frequent scenarios are:

A. “My contractions have been every 5 minutes for an hour, so I think this is it. Should I come to the hospital?” says the patient quite calmly.

“Which baby is this for you and how far dilated were you at your last visit?” I inquire.

“First baby,” patient says giggling. ”I was only 1 cm, but I’m just so excited. All the books say to come in when your contractions are 5 minutes apart!”

“Are you having any pain?” I ask, a little skeptical.

“Oh, I definitely felt some ’twinges’ with that last one,” she says with more giggling.

“Why don’t we give it a little longer. Wait until they really hurt, then check back with me,” I say {she can’t see the grin on my face}.

B. “Doctor, I think I’m in labor, but I’m not…… huff, huff, pant… sure…..if I should come in yet,” patient asks in obvious distress.

“How far apart are your contractions?” I inquire.

“They are…. just a second….” I hear phone being put down.

{Insert blood curdling shrieks and moans for the next 60 seconds.}

“…. about 6 minutes apart.”

“Yes, please come in right away!” I reply.

I don’t fault these women for not knowing exactly what is going on in their body. A woman’s first labor is a totally new experience. She can’t possibly know fully what to expect.

TV has also given everyone a warped view of the labor process. There are the cheesy sitcoms, where women have one contraction and then nearly have the baby in the car. On the other hand you have “A Baby Story” where they nicely edit an entire pregnancy and delivery into one half hour show*. Real life is not quite so predictable and usually not so fast.

Latent or early labor refers to the time from when contractions first start until you reach 5 centimeters of dilation. For the first time mom, this time period can be upwards of 24 hours with the average being about 12. Also, many moms will have false starts where their labor will kick in and then putter out over a few hours. After 5 centimeters, active labor thankfully kicks in and dilation happens at closer to 1-2 centimeters per hour.

A good rule of thumb for first time moms is that you should come to the hospital when your contractions are every 5 minutes for a hour and so uncomfortable that you can’t talk through them. When you time your contractions, start from the beginning of one contraction until the beginning of the next.

Women often get concerned about WHERE IN THEIR BELLY they should feel contractions. Are real contractions in the back? Pelvis? Everywhere? In active labor, contractions are usually felt as a total abdominal tightening pain that then causes a severe pressure into the pelvis. Real labor contractions CAN be felt anywhere in the abdomen, though more important than where is the intensity in which they are felt. Labor pain has often been described to me as ‘knife like stabbing pains in your vaginal area’ {often there are also expletives in this description…but I will leave those out}.

“But my cousin knows this girl who knows this other girl whose ex-roomate’s best friend didn’t even know she was in labor and she had her baby in the car on the way to the hospital!” you might say.

Ah yes. Everyone’s biggest fear. While crazy things like that DO happen on occasion, in my 11 years of delivering babies it has never happened with a first time mom.**

Now with additional babies, the rules change. By the time you have your sixth, we usually tell you to come to the hospital if you sneeze. I have had few patients deliver en route with third and fourth babies.

When you reach 35 weeks, usually your doctor will begin examining your cervix at each visit. She will use your dilation, combined with which baby it is for you and how far from the hospital you live to determine how soon you should come to the hospital.

And when in doubt, just call.

*Doctors hate it when you say “This isn’t how they do it on ‘The Baby Story’.”

** Full disclosure: While I’ve never had a patient give birth to her first baby in a car, it did happen to a relative of mine. But it’s really rare, so don’t sweat it.

It was a steamy Tennessee July, each swollen pregnant patient that entered my office would ask me the same question, “WHEN is this baby gonna come?”

Each time I would give my best sympathetic shrug, and reply, “Sorry I do not have any magic ability to predict labor.  I can give you my best guess, but it’s just that, a guess.”

This answer was usually met with a glare.  Then, I would watch the patient waddle down the hall, shoulders slumped in disappointment over my lack of prophetic ability.

I remember one patient that summer though, who never glared back.  Though her due date, of July 18^th came and went, she kept a good attitude as she waited for her baby to make his appearance.  Her husband made every visit, always kind and supportive.  By 10 days over her due date, with no sign of labor in sight, the decision was made to proceed with an induction of labor.

She and Hubby arrived at the hospital to start the induction, giddy with anticipation. Her cervix required an overnight dose of a medicine called cytotec to help get it ready for labor.  Her cervix was extra stubborn. The next morning a second dose had to be given.  Her husband stayed by her side the entire labor, and they both kept their spirits up despite the long process.  Finally after being at the hospital for nearly two days, it was time to push.

Despite her excellent effort, the pushing process went slowly as it often can with the first baby.  With each passing hour it seemed that her husband became increasingly anxious.  As she approached her third hour of pushing, it was nearly midnight. At this point the husband began to go from encouraging cheerleader to more l like a hardened drill sergeant. How odd, I remember thinking, that seems out of character for this mild mannered guy.

As the baby got closer to crowning, his ‘encouragements’ got louder and louder, I could tell the patient was getting annoyed. Again I wondered about his tactics, but in a labor room I’ve pretty much seen everything and nothing really surprises me at this point.

Then with one last push, a beautiful baby boy was born. He was healthy and hearty at 8 pounds even, entering this world at 11:57 pm on July 31^st.  Shortly after birth, the husband reaches in his pocket and pulls out the most beautiful ruby ring I’ve ever seen.

This is for you honey. It’s our baby’s birth stone. He said with tears in his eyes.

Suddenly his behavior made sense. Though her due date was smack dab in the middle of the month, they were minutes away from having a completely different birthstone!  Here he had bought this beautiful ring long before to celebrate his wife’s journey to motherhood, only to have it be minutes away from being obsolete.

Average gestational time

The average length of a pregnancy is 280 days (40 weeks) from the first day of the last menstrual period.  That said, only 3% of babies actually come on their ‘due date.’  Term is considered anywhere between 37 and 42 weeks. That 5 week window causes some angst for those type A planners out there.

Multiple hormones have been studied that increase at the time of labor, but we are unsure exactly what triggers these hormones to increase.  Most scientists feel that the placental tissue itself secretes some unknown protein that travels to the mom’s brain, causing labor to occur.  In other words:  the baby comes, when HE decides it wants to come.

Too Soon

Babies born before 37 weeks are considered preterm, but a new category of ‘late preterm’  is getting more and more attention.  Babies born  between 37 and 38 6/7 are fraught with a small but statistically significant increase in complications.  I mentioned earlier, after 37 weeks is considered term, and if spontaneous labor occurs during this time period, then it is usually not of too much concern. However, elective deliveries during late preterm has been highlighted by the March of Dimes over the past couple of years due to the increase risks such as poor feeding and lung immaturity requiring ventilation. Our hospital and most throughout the country have adopted rules that don’t allow for induction or elective cesarean section at less than 39 weeks unless there is a medical reason.

Too Late

Babies born after 42 weeks are considered postterm.  The placenta is an organ that is designed to work for 40 weeks, and in some cases can begin ‘wear out’ as women get past their due date.  A pregnancy that goes past 42 weeks has a 10 fold increased rate of stillbirth.  Once past 41 weeks, it is recommended to begin doing tests to make sure that the placenta is still healthy and baby is continuing to get enough oxygen. Induction is usually recommended if the cervix is dilated or if the pregnancy approaches 42 weeks.

Risk factors for going over your due date include:

First pregnancy

Male baby

Previous pregnancy overdue

For now, there is no magic test to estimate when the baby will come.  I can give it my best guess based on the dilation of the cervix, but that is not very scientific.  Until the technology improves, we will have to wait for the babies to come when THEY decide they are ready, and  hold off on buying any birthstone jewelry until AFTER the baby is born.

When I googled "Miserable pregnant women" I got a picture of Jaba in the results..... Found that pretty hilarious!

Patient stories are either used with permission or are a fictitious conglomerate of multiple patient encounters.

Our Family

Last week Dr. Rupe asked if she could do a post about my delivery. She wasn’t sure if I would have time in these first few, crazy weeks to blog about Joshua’s birth. I was excited to read her point of view on the day’s events and I believe she captured it perfectly (with one exception, according to his birth certificate, he was actually born at 4:56pm, not 4:57 but close enough). I’m sitting here in the stillness of my living room. . .filled with diapers and wipes, baby gear and antibacterial gel, and one, little, precious, sleeping baby boy (Hope is at mother’s day out today) so I thought I would take this quiet time to also reflect on my son’s birth. Thank you for allowing me to be self-indulgent on this blog. As I’ve mentioned before, I abandoned my personal blog (which had become a sort of journal for me) to focus on The Pregnancy Companion so I appreciate you letting me share my heart here on personal experiences. At least they are pregnancy related.

As Dr. Rupe said, on Saturday morning, July 2 I texted her because I thought my water had broken. It’s important to note that I was already 4cm dilated and 70% effaced at my last appointment so I had reason to suspect I might go into labor at any moment. Since I was induced last time, I had no idea what going into labor would actually feel like. I was apprehensive about my water breaking spontaneously. So many friends had different stories to tell but many said it was more like a leak than a gush of fluid. They also said it merely felt like they pee’d in their pants a little bit. Having done that before during my pregnancy (you can read that story and how it led to the creation of this book here) I just wasn’t sure I’d know the difference. I woke up Saturday morning and decided to take a shower and get ready, just in case. I felt like it might be the day because I was having mild but pretty regular contractions the night before. As I stood in the shower drying off, I felt some leaking. Could this be my water leaking or did I just pee on myself again? I got out and got dressed and as I was doing my hair, it happened again. But this time it was greater. I felt like I had total control of my bladder so I decided this was it. I texted Dr. Rupe to let her know. She told me to come on in.

We arrived at the hospital and they hooked me up. My amazing nurse, Rachel eventually checked me and said my water had in fact not broken as there was no presence of amniotic fluid that they could detect. I was, however, having pretty regular contractions so she would call Dr. Rupe to see what she wanted to do. I knew the U2 concert was just hours away and I told myself if I was going to have this baby and not ruin her evening with Bono, that I had to be in labor by 10am. We were a bit past my personal deadline and as much as I was ready to have this baby, I was sure Dr. Rupe would send me home to wait for more active labor to begin. To my surprise she decided to go ahead and put me on Pitocin as I was in the early stages of labor. She must have known it was a risk. . .that I might not deliver quite fast enough for her to make it to see U2, but my sweet friend and physician also knew that if she sent me home, I might just end up back there that night. We were definitely rolling the dice!

I’ll spare you the details because she explained them very well. Pitocin started. Contractions kicked in. Water broken for real this time with a giant knitting needle (and when done this way it’s a HUGE gush, I don’t mind telling you). Epidural ordered. Contractions picking up. Epidural in but not working. Epidural dosed up. Finally some relief (for about an hour, enough time to watch one episode of Friday Night Lights, my new addiction). Finally dilated to 7. Nurse assures me it will go quickly now. I’m hoping to deliver by 6 or 6:30 but I know that’s pushing it.

As I entered transition (roughly 7-10cm dilation), the epidural wore off on my right side. They had me laying on my side so gravity could do it’s work but still no relief. My left side was dead to the world (due to all of the extra doses) but the right felt everything. For that hour between 7-10cm (the nurse was right, it did go fast thank you Jesus), I felt the pain and pressure of every intense contraction. I was not prepared to labor like that but my nurse and my husband were amazing coaches. They kept trying to get the epidural to fully kick in but no luck. Finally, Rachel announced it was time to get ready to start pushing. Dr. Rupe wasn’t yet in the room and I hoped after all this she didn’t miss it. I felt like he could come quickly. I was incredibly nervous about pushing a baby out without a working epidural. This is not what I had signed up for! As they got ready to position me Dr. Rupe walked in the room and I was so relieved to see her. The nurses got me on my back and almost immediately I felt a rush of peace come over my body. I felt so relaxed and the pain on my right side disappeared. I truly believe that Christ’s power rested on me in that delivery room (2 Cor 12:9, from chp 8 in the book). After 10 minutes and 3 rounds of pushing (through three contractions), I finally saw my baby boy. Miraculous.

I’ll add to Dr. Rupe’s list, the last five years have also included:

about 75 ultrasounds

7 HCG shots

amazing provision for the countless checks written to a fertility clinic

thousands of tears of loss and pain

a million petitions for life and a family

a deep, deep friendship born out of longing and hope

and now, a complete family with one spirited, beautiful little girl and a sweet, new baby boy. Oh how we are blessed beyond comprehension. And if I could go back and rewrite my story to remove the waiting, the loss, the emotional and financial burden and still have the same outcome – I would not. I truly believe the processes God allows us to walk through in our lives shape us and mold us into the people he intends for us to be. I know he wept with us along the way and now rejoices in our dreams fulfilled. I am so thankful he entrusted us with this story and I hope I can encourage others as they continue to allow him to write their own.

Thank you all for sharing this journey with me.

Love,

Jessica

Georgia’s Birth Story: Angela Ward

My due date was Feb.2, 2008 and I was anxiously awaiting the birth of our first baby. We decided not to find out the gender so we were counting down the days until delivery!! We took some classes at the hospital on childbirth and we felt very prepared with all of the things that “can occur” during labor and delivery… but we knew overall that healthy mom=healthy baby! Our ideal birth plan was to go into labor naturally at home and then when contractions became intense to head to the hospital and eventually receive an epidural.

Well, my mucous plug came out at 3am on Feb. 1 and I immediately started having contractions. I labored at home all day and by 7:00 that evening I was feeling intense contractions 5 minutes apart. We checked into the hospital at 10:00pm. I was admitted, put in a room and received the epidural shortly after.

The baby seemed to be progressing fine and my water broke on its own. By 5am I was ready to push and we were so excited that everything had worked out “perfect” according to our birth plan that we had wanted. My doctor came in and I pushed for what seemed to be over an hour … completely exhausted… I remember pushing my hardest and there being lots of blood but no baby … and my husband kept telling me he could barely see the baby’s head. My doctor said the baby’s heart rate was starting to drop and we would have to try to use the vacuum in order to get the baby out more quickly. Even though I was exhausted and sore and tired, I knew I could trust her and that she would do whatever it took for me and the baby to be healthy. The doctor tried to get the baby out, but the baby’ s heart rate continued to drop and she was not close enough to deliver. My doctor quickly came to my side and said “ you have done a great job and we have been pushing for almost 2 hrs, …for your safety and the safety of your baby I think it would be best to deliver by cesarean.” Tears
filled my eyes because I desperately wanted a vaginal birth and to be able to hold the baby on my chest. I had always imagined my birth story to be this way – not surgery! I quickly remembered, in birthing class that what matters most is a healthy baby – not my perfect story. The staff moved quickly and I delivered a healthy baby girl at 7:15 am Feb 2 – Georgia Love Ward !! I gave birth to my second daughter this past September via cesarean as well and it went very smooth – in fact, it was so fun to have it scheduled!

When I talk to expecting moms now I always tell them to trust the Lord, trust your doctor and never make too many “plans”!! Pregnancy and labor/delivery is different for every woman!

Georgia Love Ward

Today’s birth story is a great reminder that things don’t always go as we plan. If you are pregnant (especially if it’s your first child) remember to trust the Lord and trust your doctor (as Angela puts it) and if nothing else, while laboring through, chant the following mantra as you breath in and out:

HEALTHY BABY, HEALTHY MOMMY

In the end, that’s the only thing that matters.

Love,

Jessica

Brooklyn’s Birth Story: Becka Edmonson

There were a number of things that influenced my husband’s and my decision in wanting a “natural childbirth,” including that we felt like it was the safest for me and the baby, and that I wanted movement of my legs during and after labor. But most importantly, we had a clear sense that this is what the Lord had called us to. I knew that God had specifically designed our bodies to deliver babies and I was excited to experience this natural process He created. I also felt that the majority of the time in our lives, our tendency is to avoid pain or discomfort at any cost, and this was a time the Lord was asking me to learn to not only endure pain but to embrace it for what He wanted to teach me through the process. We took some great advice from a friend to enroll in Bradley Method classes which was so helpful in preparing us for the journey ahead!

Alright…here’s how it went down. During my last appointment with my doctor, she strongly recommended we not go a day past my due date because of some concerns with the baby not growing adequately. So 5 days before my due date we resigned our ideals of having a completely natural labor, and scheduled the induction. We prayed that night – most importantly for the health and safety for our baby but also that my body would begin labor naturally. Our prayers were answered and that very night I began the early stages of labor! It was hard to sleep – I was so excited! I got up pretty early in the morning to get going on my to-do list…I felt like a ticking time bomb at this point and there was much to do. All through early stages of labor I shopped, ran errands, and cleaned house which was a great way to pass the time!

By the time my husband Brandon got home from work things were getting pretty intense. He started timing the contractions and I spent the next couple of hours laboring at home. The contractions got longer and closer together and although we wanted to labor in the comfort of our home as long as possible, there had also been some previous concerns with Brooklyn’s heart rate dropping and we didn’t want to risk it. So after talking to my doctor, we decided it was time to head to the hospital. By the time we got set up in our room at the hospital the contractions were so painful that I was sure that I must be in transition. My doctor came in and checked my dilation and told me I was dilated to a 4. A 4! I was completely demoralized. At the perfect time, my dear friend and labor coach Gwen arrived and spoke the words of encouragement that I desperately needed. Over the next few hours things progressed, but much slower than I wanted them to. I inched my way to a 6 and a 7. This really hurt! But I was finding relief in getting in and out of the bath, and I had an awesome team of people surrounding me – Brandon, Gwen, my sweet nurses, and my doctor – that brought so much peace and encouragement to me. I focused on what Gwen called “making every contraction count” – trying to relax through contractions instead of fighting them so that each one allowed my body to get closer and closer.

Finally I moved into transition. The pain was more intense than ever and I began crying out to Jesus to help me…I knew I could not do this on my own. I was in a greater amount of pain than I ever knew was possible but God is so faithful – I also began to feel His grace and strength upon me at a greater amount I ever knew possible. At this time things took a turn and I began progressing at a much faster rate. My water broke and I moved quickly to a 10. The room suddenly became full of action as the nurses started setting the room up for delivery. I felt a burst of renewed energy and excitement – I was going to meet this baby soon! And what felt equally as important – this pain was going to be over soon! Pushing was hard – I thought that my body was possibly splitting in half. But it turns out things were actually working just as they were supposed to. After 45 minutes of pushing I remember my doctor saying “I can see her…3 more pushes Becka and she’s here!” I gave it my best 3 pushes and there she was!! My husband was able to catch her and then quickly had to hand her off to a nurse who needed to fix the umbilical cord that had become wrapped around her.

Baby Brooklyn

Soon they placed her on my chest – I can’t describe the feeling of holding my darling baby girl for the first time. The first thing I said to her through tears was “Brooklyn, you were so worth it!!” And she was. So worth every contraction, every ounce of pain…I would have done it a thousand times over just to hold her in my arms for that single moment. She was 5 lbs, 10 oz, 19 inches, and absolutely perfect. I was in love!

I just love hearing stories of first time moms who had a good experience with natural childbirth. It’s important to remember though, natural childbirth is not for everyone and you shouldn’t feel badly if this was not your story or your strong conviction. The important thing is to pray about what God wants for you and your birth story. Kudos to Becka though for pushing (literally) through it. Amazing!

We’ll keep the stories coming and you’ll see a plethora of birth accounts that run the gamut and hopefully encourage you that although every entry into this world is unique due to personal preferences, convictions and circumstance; every birth is an awesome miracle.

Love,

Jessica

Spring is here! I cannot adequately express how excited I am that the weather is warmer and flowers are popping up all over the place. . . that is except my yard. I’ve got a bit of a black thumb. But more on that another time. I can’t think of a better time to share stories of new life then at the onset of this new season. Over the next month or so we’ll be featuring birth stories right here. We’ve asked some of our friends whose babies entered the world in pretty unique ways to share their story with us. We hope that with each retelling, you’ll stand amazed at the miracle of life. We also hope that first time mommies-to-be will get a glimpse into the reality that you can plan and dream all you want, but sometimes you just can’t control how your little one arrives.

Ben’s Birth Story: Rachel Ribble

At about 3:30am, I woke my hubby up to go to the hospital.  I had been lying in bed for awhile, and I finally had no doubt that I was in labor.  I had gone to the hospital a few weeks earlier with false labor, so I wanted to be sure.  My contractions were becoming more intense and closer together.

My husband, Clint, wanted to know if he had time to take a shower.  I supposed so, since I could still walk and talk easily.  And my water had not broken yet.  My labor was induced for my first born, so this all-natural process was completely different for me.  By the time Clint was out of the shower, I was on the floor crawling on my knees.

We quickly made our way into the car, and Clint drove us over to a friend’s house.  Joseff, our 24-month old, was going to stay with close friends. (We had made pre-arrangements with Joseff’s Uncle, but this was the one night in October that he was out-of-town.)   Clint took Joseff inside, and then came back to the car to grab the rest of his things.  As soon as he went back to the house, my water broke.  And I had the sudden urge to push.

Clint rushed back into the car, after noticing the look on my face.  I was trying hard not to push, and trying to breathe deeply and slowly.  He asked me if I wanted to get into the backseat.  I was glued to the front passenger-seat, and we didn’t have time to waste.  I was focused on trying to relax through the surges believing in God’s protection, while Clint sped and prayed his way to Vanderbilt’s ER.

When we got there, Clint parked in the ER’s semi-circle driveway and went to get help.  The only person in the lobby at this hour was a security guard to tell, and then a nurse walked within earshot.  They both looked at Clint with doubt, thinking he’s just another panicky Dad.  He came back to the car with an exasperated look on his face.  He said that someone was coming to check on me, but that they didn’t believe his urgency.  My baby boy’s head was crowning, but the urge to push had stopped.  He ran back inside to make someone come out.  I was just waiting.  Clint came back and a nurse finally came over to our car to check on me.  She felt the head, and with and “Oh!” rushed back into the ER.  A bunch of medical staff surrounded our car, about 12 people in all, and with 2 pushes, I delivered Benjamin into the hands of an ER doctor.  It was the ER doctor’s first baby delivery.  And it was Benjamin’s first adventure into the world in the front seat of our car.

Wow. Although I’d love for my second child to come this quickly, I can’t imagine having him in the front seat of my car. Thank you Rachel for sharing Ben’s story with us. You are one tough woman! Read more from Rachel here.

We hope you enjoy this feature on the site. Don’t let these stories scare you, most of them are pretty out of the ordinary. Do you have a unique birth story to share? Send us an email through the Connect page. We’d love to feature it here.

Happy Spring!

Jessica